What do you want to become when you grow up?

 What would you like to be in the future?

As I sat across my desk and took a glance at my shelf and saw my name splattered across these books, it finally dawned on me that I have written and published 8 children's fiction books (many are yet to be published). Most of which sold out and have been reprinted. My best selling book (31 mornings) not in the picture because it's almost always sold out has been to 5 continents of the world.

Yet, as an SS3 student, when I was asked the question as to what I would want to be in the future, I had no answer.

In my school, all SS1 students were made to take Arts and Science subjects and the school did the placement themselves. I passed both in equal measure and I was sent to Science class. I declined and opted for Art class. While I wasn't sure of what I wanted to become, I was sure of what I didn't want to become.

I was lucky to have been offered two spots in the University- Linguistics and Theatre Arts. I definitely didn't want to be an actress and I so I stepped into the uncertain waters of the former.

During all of these phases of my life, I have always written stories. It took me travelling to London and interning with an NGO called "Children of the Mekong" to realise my true passion was a consolidation of Telling stories and Education. About 7 years later.

I was writing stories for the NGO to showcase the out-of-school.children in Asia and get funding for them and it worked. I thought to myself; I can do this to for my people.

The problem with asking children what they want to becomenis that:
1) You limit them to their current exposure and experience. They cannot think fatther than what they know at the time.

2) You unknowingly make them think what they must become is a particular stop, a final destination. The path to their future is a culmination of all the paths they go through.

3) You force them to limit their options. It is their right to be offered enough choices to choose from. You can only show them many options by showing them the world through different mediums. Unfortunately, the truth of the matter is that the poorer you are, the more disadvantage your children are because the less opportunities you will have to give them. What can you do? Invest in school clubs, buy books on different subjects for them

4) They inherently are unconsciously compelled to follow in their parent's path. This is not altogether a bad thing. The problem comes when they lack passion and it begins to feel like coercion. There is no fulfillment.

So what questions should Educators and Parents be asking?

"What do you enjoy doing?"
"What are your interests?"
"What problems would you like to solve?"

 Your favourite writer girl, 

Love

Reliable God pt 2

 In my last letter to you on the 27th of January, 2023; I mentioned how 2 events birthed this new song. Now here's the part 2:

I knew in my gut something was wrong with my daughter's leg when she was 8 months old. Everyone around told me it was "normal bowlegs. E go straight as she dey grow".

Our journey began when she was 3 years old. Xrays confirmed she had Blounts. Pharmacy made money from me😄 we bought everything calcium, fish oil. EVERYTHING. Bone broth nko.

It was when she turned 5 years, the journey to Kano began. After consulting EVERY orthopaedic hospital in Kaduna. Yup, name them, we have their card. They could not handle it.
So my mum and I would travel a day before our appointment, arrive the National orthopaedic hospital by 5am and we would still meet people there. Once, we didn't see the doctor till 1pm.

It was there we were told she would have to had surgery. That was the only option but she had to be older. My daughter was in pain and discomfort for years. Let's not even talk about the disgusting stares from people or unsolicited advice from people who knew nothing of what we were dealing with.

My husband came into my life and na two of us begin dey run the Kano trips. Time for surgery finally came but that was when kidnapping was at an all time high especially on the Kano route. We found a hospital here in Kaduna that we didn't know of before. Nifemi had her first surgery time; few days to her birthday. We had taken cute pictures before surgery and I posted on her birthday. So while everyone wished her a happy birthday on social media, she was in excruciatingly pain. I was in pain. I would go outside the room and cry and cry.

Unfortunately, 2 months after surgery, the right leg recurred. Back to almost square one. The pain was something else. A friend connected us to a private hospital in Kano. We went back; trusting God for his protection on the road. After assessing the situation; we were told Nifemi would have to undergo Ilizarov.

In simple terms, illizarov is a treatment in which the bones will be drilled and irons and wires will be passed through the bones to force the bones to straighten out. Nifemi was in tge theatre for about 7 hours. Do you know pain? Multiply it by 100. I kept saying to her "The pain is coming to pass". She still says it till today. She says she can never forget that every pain doesn't stay with us, it comes to pass.

My husband and I with Nifemi stayed 1 month in the hospital. One day while still in the hospital, the xray was not looking good. Nifemi asked me what was going on. I told her the report was great. Then she said "Mummy promise me I will never have to go through this pain". I told she would never. Then I went outside to cry."Please Papa, don't let my baby pass through this again. Please go into her legs and fix what needs to be fixed". Amidst my tears, tge remaining part of this song came to me. The next day, the doctors were excited about the xray result. There was a quick turnaround. And somebody will tell me there is no God?

We came home with the irons still on her leg for another 2 months. Dorathy and I were cleaning the irons twice a day everyday. She resumed school. We sewed baggy uniforms and clothes to cover her leg. One thing I was sure about, we were not going to hide. My daughter is a walking miracle.

Then we went back to Kano again. Yay! The irons and wires had given all they were to give. Then her leg was casted for another 6 weeks.

Then she learnt how to walk again. Then we were back to Kano again for implantation of clips surgery to prevent the bones having a mind of their own. Nifemi will continue to have regular checkups until she is an adult.

God proved himself to be:
Good
Kind
Dependable
Reliable
A promise keeper

I would love to hear your own stories of how God came through big time for you.

May you be carried in the arms of Abba.

Please download #ReliableGod by me on the link below and SHARE thus sound with EVERYBODY.

https://kingdomboiz.com/download-mp3-love-ebunlola-samuel-reliable-god/

Credits
Producer: Lakesbeat
Director: Emmanuel Ahiome
Male vocals: Ehigocho Samuel, Emmanuel Ahiome
Female vocals: Love Ebunlola Samuel, Bamidele Victor, Sandra Udoh



Love, light and sunshine,

Your favourite writer girl,
Love

Reliable God pt 1

 Two major events birthed this song:

The day we moved in into our home, I waited till everyone was asleep before I came into the living room.

I couldn't believe we were finally 'here'. I sat in the dark but all the lights in the compound shone through the window pane as we hadn't fixed the curtains. It was a beautiful sight and I started to cry.

One Friday, a year before we moved in, my husband came to my office and told me we had to leave. I told him I still had a lot of work. Then he dropped a bombshell "They said they are on the way to demolish our house" 😭 Building that was already standing. The news was shocking. How? Why?

We gathered our children. We got to the site and all sat on bare ground. Crying, praying. 'They' came and apparently someone (a person we know) had reported us for an infringement. A miracle happened that day. Although we were made to stop work for a year, our house was not demolished.

I kept prophesying that "We will build houses and INHABIT them". I burst out in worship in our first day and the words below came to me.


You keep your promises
You never fail me God
You are the promise keeper

I recorded it. I sang these 3 line for weeks.

Another event brought the remaining lyrics of the song 🙏

Your favourite writer girl,
Love.

He has made my heart happy

 I cried hot tears this morning on the altar as we (the choir) ministered our special song; Toya Eze by Tim Godfrey. I had managed to hold back the tears but as soon as we got to "Idiri Obim Mma" part, the flood gates were opened. It means "You're good to my heart" but my personal translation for that phrase is "You've made my heart happy".

Now back to why I shed tears. During the week, Facebook had reminded me about a post I made in 2017 about events in 2016. Right there on stage, the memories came flooding back. The period 2012-2017 were the toughest years of my life. The domestic violence, the abuse, the several suicide attempts, the strangulation I suffered, the maltreatment, the separation from my suckling infant, the several losses, the poverty, the deep sadness that eventually led to depression, the shame, the disgrace, the divorce, the starting over from nothing. I am no longer that person. God has made my heart happy. I am blessed with the best husband, amazing children. We are thriving. My heart is happy. The tears I cried were of joy. ÀséwéréniséOluwá

The reference post ⬇️

JUST BEFORE YOU SCREAM 'GOALS' (26th Nov 2016)

*The car in the picture is not mine. As a matter of fact, I 'backed' my daughter to cross the express road and used keke Napep (tricycle) to complete the journey. My friend ordered a cab to take us back home.
*The wig was given to me by the friend I was visiting. This was after she saw the state of the wig I wore to her house.
*That was not the dress I wore to her house. I changed into it after she gave me. I was wearing an okrika (fairly used) top I bought for N500 (it was even a gift to myself for sticking to my meal plan.)
*The sandal was my neighbour's. Said she couldn't let me go out with what I had on.
*I was smiling but my heart was greatly troubled. I went out without seeking 'permission' (from my ex spouse)I knew I wouldn't be given and I had gotten a call informing me I was in trouble. Still I posed for the picture while thinking my life was over that day.

Make no mistake however, I was very content in my situation. I was/am all about the will of God.

Looking at the picture without all these information, it looks like I was living the life. 😂 Don't let the gram fool you. EVERYONE is fighting their own battles. Don't feel frustrated because someone's life looks perfect on social media or outwardly while you can't seem to get your life together. People let you see what they want you to see. DO NOT compare your journey, marraige, relationship, business, children, parents, siblings, job, lifestyle, etc with anyone else. The only 'GOALS' in my life is Jesus Christ. He keeps it real. 💯💯💯💯💯💯With Jesus, there is no need for pretence. He went through every kind of temptation and he daily teaches us how we too can live above sin. There is no hidden or coded part to Him. You see EVERYTHING.

My name is Love, I am imperfectly perfect and my transparency makes people uncomfortable. I fell from grace to grass and I am not ashamed. Still, I rise.

I made pancakes today

 I made pancakes today.

Not after I had the most beautiful devotion listening to God's word at 4am (Thanks Brian of the Daily Audio Bible).

I made pancakes today.

I got into my w

orkout wear after my devotion to begin ny exercise for the day. Then oops, I remembered today was pancake day. 'I better get started', I thought and concurrently work out.

I made pancakes today.

I brought out my ingredients and utensils. I opened the tap to wash my utensils because those roaches are not loyal, but no water came out. Ugh

I made pancakes today.

Oh! It rained. I don't like rain. No no, not that I don't like rain but I don't like the consequences of rain. At least in Nigeria. Rain equals lack of power supply. Lack of power supply equal inability to pump water.

I made pancakes today.

Lack of water also means going late to work and school. How? The water heater will not work. We will all have to wait our turn at the gas cooker.

I made pancakes today.

Thankfully, there was still water in the tap outside. So we fetched, heated and had our baths.

I made pancakes today.

In the midst of the chaos, I opened Instagram and saw that Goodluck Jonathan is running for president under APC. Wow!

I made pancakes today.

It's 7:23am. We are all settled in school. God is always faithful.

Thankful that the pancakes were made in spite of it all. Pancakes make everybody happy.

Oops I forgot to add, the workout did not happen.

Have a great day ❤

Your favourite writer girl,
Love.

When you are the PEOPLE

         When you are the "people"

"Why didn't she leave?" Was it because of what 'people' would say?

Have you stopped to consider if you are the 'people'. If perhaps you may have contributed to the mental breakdown, shame, indecision and probably even death of an individual by your words; deliberate or not.

I've had my share of church hurt. The people whom you call your brothers and sisters putting you down without knowing the full story. Its the arrogance of righteousness that irks me the most. The feeling of "Can-never-be-me".

I suffered domestic abuse. I suffered the worst form of mental abuse. I had 2 suicide attempts and was severely depressed. So I left.

The 'people', my fellow brethren; the ones who were to have my back said:

"You hear say she don comot for husband house"

"I no say that marriage no fit work. Even Dangote pikin no get pride like her"

"She for kuku stay London marry oyinbo. She no go fit live with African man"

"You hear say her mama born for another man before she marry her papa? Na their pattern for their family"

"They say dem drive her comot o say she no fit born another pikin again"

Then there were the ones who had the audacity to say it to my face:

"Your parents may be rich but you must submit to the man. Stop all this pride"

"You are a reprobate"

"You better go and beg. No one will marry you especially now that you even have a daughter"

It didn't matter to the 'people' that I still deal with migraine because of the severe hit to my head or that my left eye is still functioning by the grace of God. It didn't matter to them that I stood in the middle of a busy road and prayed to be knocked down by a car.

When you listen and allow such conversations happen in your presence, you are the 'people'

When you contribute to such conversations with or without the correct facts, you are the 'people'.

When you gossip about people, you are the 'people'

When you make negative assumptions about people based on what someone has told you, you are the 'people'

When you troll people online, you are the 'people'

Yes, what you say matters! I could face 'the people' with my full chest because I had lost everything anyway but some others cannot and so they die in silence to avoid what 'the people's would say.

If we truly love ourselves as Christ loves the church. If we truly see ourselves as brothers and sisters and as a family; it would be easier to run back home.

Pray for your sister. Pray for your brother. Do not be interested in the gist. Just pray for them and if you can, be there for them.

Are you the 'people'?
(This is a rhetorical question that calls for deep reflection).

Matt. 25: 31-40

P.s to every one going through domestic abuse, know that God will pick you over your marriage in a heartbeat. Know that you are first someone before all the titles  know that you have a predestined purpose before you became a wife. Know that he is a restorer, look at me. Leave!

You have all my love,

Your favourite writer girl,
Love.

HOW I MET MY HUSBAND (FINAL EPISODE)

 Meanwhile, Ehigocho was always on my matter. Before the breakup, he felt I was always on the phone with him.

Hian! Uncle face your own relationship na, let me face my own. He began complaining that I was not having his time😂 As what na!

Anyway, as expected, Ehi was the first to know about the breakup and the revelations I had. My ex and I had blocked ourselves everywhere. Not out of anger but for peace of mind. I believe same for him. But there was one issue. My ex was really instrumental in the completion of #31mornings (My book). Many late nights even with the distance, encouraging me and pushing me till I finally published. I felt it was only right, he gets a copy of the book.

So I begged Ehi to help me contact him and find out how a copy could be sent to him. Ehi called, he declined but wished me all the best in the future. Ouch! I prayed for God to let him see why I had to walk away and heal both of us. A few months later, I saw that I had been tagged by him on Instagram on a post that read something along the lines of "Tag someone who is no longer in your life but was sunshine during their time in your life". For me, it meant all had been forgiven. That chapter officially closed.

I was back to being single, enjoying and living life. I now had a dream. I saw Ehi and I getting married and dancing. From where to where? How? I brushed it off.
"What's going on between you and Ehi?", my mum asked one day. I told her nothing. Then she said she had a dream and saw us getting married. There were more dreams by other people.

It was at this point I actually began to see him. Like really see him. Then I had a second dream confirming the first. So I knew Ehi was my husband but Ehi was in another relationship. I told God to tell him by himself and leave me out of it.

I withdrew from him. I wasn't calling and texting as I used to. I deliberately began to distance myself because your girl was already catching feelings for someone who was with someone else. It didn't feel right.

He was worried and asked why I was changing. I told him I felt like a distraction as it concerned his relationship. I told him not to call me more than once a day. He really missed me🤣🤣 We drifted apart but it was a time of pruning for both of us.

One Sunday evening, Ehi called me to say he was at the door. I went outside and saw he was covered in dust. He said he had gone on a long walk to clear his head. I tried to make banter but he had his serious face on.

He explained that he had been in love with me for several months (even all the while I began that previous relationship)and had been suppressing it because he did not even know how to begin. He also did not know how to break up from someone who was good and kind to him but was not his heart's choice nor God's choice.

He had to painfully walk away and was ready to do everything to get me to love him. Me that I had been loving him and was only waiting for him to catch up. Baba God, I see your doings!

We hugged it out, there was no need to form Let- me- pray- about- it. I said "Bros, make we begin, I don dey wait you". When we both shared different revelations we had, we were amazed at how God is so intentional. He was upgraded from 'Ehi' to 'Babe' on my phone. 😁

The next day, he was sitting across my father asking permission to court and marry me. A man of integrity, I stan 👏

This week, we celebrate the best 3 years of marriage with my purpose partner, best friend, baby daddy, Chief Encouragement Officer and all round guy.

It's how we play like kids and make our kids; the actual kids stare at us in bewilderment. It's the going everywhere together: Buy one, get one free.

It's the good-night pecks every night's and the good-morning warm squishy hugs every morning.

It's the sharing of responsibilities around the house and our resilience to get in kids in bed by 7pm so we can breathe 🤣

It's the hiding to eat things so our children will not beg us 🤣

It's his fine face for me. Charismatic walk and the voice of an angel.

It's how he indulges my love for Tiktok and learns every dance routine with me.

It's how he loves me.

Gosh, I love Ehigocho so much. Marriage is sweet o. Just marry your own.

Everyday, I bless God for my biggest gift. ❤
Happy Anniversary my love.

Your favourite writer girl,
Love.