Monday 19 June 2017

It is time to let go

My daughter, Nifemi and I attended a wedding sometime ago. I ran into an old friend of mine who was just meeting her for the first time. As is the norm, he reached for his pocket and gave her 'something' which was a N1000 note. I stylishly collected from her and put in my bag. It couldn't have come at a better time. I was in a very dry season. Y'all know those kind of seasons😂 broke but still looking fly. Anyhoo, in my head, I had finished spending that money. I had allocated it to different things. My mood was lightened up. This N1000 was really going to make my life easier. We got home and I dropped my bag on the bed and got into the kitchen to make something for us to eat. Unknown to me, Nifemi had gone to my bag, taken the money and tore it in two. Oh my chest😅 I think I may have had symptoms of a heart attack that day. I was first infuriated but then I thought to myself, 'I can fix this'. So I began to search frantically for the missing piece. 'I'll just use a cellotape, it will be fine'. Minutes turned to hours, hours to days, days to weeks, weeks to months and I never found the missing piece. I refused to let the other half go. I held on to 'what could have been' if that money was in hand. I asked if the banks could take It and I was told I needed the missing piece. I was obsessed with trying to figure out what time exactly she took it out of the bag. I became an FBI agent. It was too valuable to let go. Hundreds of N1000 notes have passed through my hands since then but I still clung to this one with the missing piece. Yesterday, I let it go. I have finally accepted that it is gone. It's been over a year and we have even changed houses, it's time to move on.
I would like to speak/write to people like me who have experienced some kind of loss. I made the decision earlier in the year to hand over my school to someone else and join my mum at the Headquarters. It was a very painful decision I was not willing to take. It was drowning me financially, emotionally and psychological. I knew I would have to make that decision sooner or later but I had invested tears and blood and I was not willing to let go. I held onto 'what could be of the school' maybe another month, maybe in a few months and so I continued to fall apart. Everyone counselled me to move on but I just could not. 'It has potential' I argued, just a few more months and I would be oKay. Well, I wasn't. I knew it was time. I handed over and I legit thought the school would be over. Not only has the school grown under new leadership, no pupil was lost and all staff remained. I cried. Look at God! I was holding so tightly when He wanted me to release it and watch it blossom.
Probably you might have lost a loved one to the cold hands of death and you just can't bring yourself to move on. You are holding so dearly to what could have been. God is asking you to let go. Or a business you have toiled so hard for and you can't just let it go. It is killing you but you'd rather die. There's a fine line between perseverance and foolishness. Let it go. Perhaps, you're a student in a wrong discipline and you know it. You have probably spent 2-3 years and you are wondering how to start over. Please do have a rethink. It makes no sense to hold unto something that is not working. Or you are probably engaged to be married and you know that Person is not your missing piece. So you try to fix it and manage the situation. Don't. Let it go. The missing piece will find you. You won't have to go crazy looking for it.
It is not cowardice to walk away, it takes strength. You are a hero. It is okay to move on. People may laugh and make snide comments, Yes. But YOU win in the end and that is what counts. That at the end when you look back on your life, you didn't just settle or manage or continually be in hope for something that was not meant to be but that your life is COMPLETE, MEANINGFUL and you are at REST.
P.S If you've ever had to deal with the death of a loved one, miscarriage, divorce, broken engagement, career change, business failure; know that you are the real MVP. There is more to your story.
Have a blessed week and if this has blessed you please do share with your family and friends. Thank you for your love always.
Peace, love and light 

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