On Divorce. Episode 7

 

 Episode 7

Thirty Tales

On divorce

Imagine this scenario:

You live in Nigeria. Light is unstable which also makes availability of water unstable since you have to pump your own water with electricity. The sensible thing to do is to have water storage just in case light fails, you have some water to use.

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The water in one of the pales you stored water is already a month old. You keep making mental notes to change the water but you keep forgetting. It is December, the harmattan is at its peak and the water in your storage container is icy-cold.

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Your child had a rough night and slept late. Of course you had to watch over her and barely slept. But you have to go to work and you have to take her with you. You manage to get up and bath. To give your child extra minutes of sleep, you decide to get your make up done and even put on your work clothes before waking her. You are now fully dressed for work.

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You wake your child, take her to the bathroom and start to bath her while taking extra care not to spill water on your dress. At that moment, your spouse wakes up. "Good morning", you manage to mutter. You are very unhappy. "That's how to greet abi, it's like you don't have sense", he replies. You do not want any trouble, so you say nothing. You continue to bath your child. "Is it not you I am talking to?", he queries. You ignore. Your spouse then steps into the bathroom, picks up the one-month old pale of icy-cold water and pours it on you from your head. You immediately push your child backwards so the water does not touch her. You are shivering. Your hair is wet. Your makeup is ruined. Your dress and inner wears are drenched in water. You still do not say or do anything. You get out of the bathroom, dress up your child, change your clothes and drive out with your child without uttering a word.

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But why? Why do nothing? Because it will be worse. You had been told not to fuel his anger by retaliating with words. Because of the constant migraines you had from been hit on the head. Because you barely escaped with your right eye one of the times. Because you had just taken a body scan. Those ones where something is connected to your hand and it reads on a laptop screen. You had just been shown something on the screen. You did not know what it meant but then you were told one of your brain nerves was weak or damaged (I can't remember the exact term). You were asked your medical history and everything checked out but then you were asked "did you have an accident? Has there been any hit to your head?". Of course you say no but you kow where the issue is coming from. Because you need those migraines to stop badly. You tell no soul of what you have just learnt but you are determined to stay alive so you opt for silence. 

You take it all in but then one day comes. The day you decide to truly live. You finally exhale.

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You can stop imagining now. This used to be me.

Am I here to argue on the biblical/moral grounds for divorce? Nope. I am just here to say that IF the time comes when you have to choose between being alive and your marriage, I hope you choose your life.

Your favourite writer girl,

Love.